Monday, March 19, 2012

You Don't Talk Me Down

I'm married to a dreamer. His mind is full of ideas - things to try, things to accomplish, at home, in career, in life.


I am more of a realist. I'm creative, but I'm also practical.


AJ is often coming to me with his ideas, big and small. He's so excited, thinking about all that is possible. My automatic reaction is a quick brain scan: ok, here's an idea, is it realistic? Is it possible physically? Financially? The answer is almost always no and I start listing off reasons why it wouldn't work. You can almost watch the bubble burst, but I figure he might as well realize it won't work before he gets too far into it.


My way ensures that we continue to live comfortably, financially stable, living in a straight line of knowing what's to come. But it also means we're not growing, arguably not really living life to the fullest. And certainly for AJ, a little bored.


One of our favourite bands is Jack's Mannequin. On their new album is a song that must have been written just for me. The chorus has given me new insight on letting AJ be AJ without letting go of me.


          "And you don't talk me down
          You're talking me through"


AJ's not completely irrational. He may have all these ideas, but he does think them through before he decides to carry them out. So when he has a dream that he truly wants to pursue, what if, instead of talking him down, I used my practical, detail-oriented personality to talk him through?


I'm in marketing and when we're trying to come up with an idea, we first have a brainstorming session. This is where you speak any idea that comes into your head, boring, crazy, practical or not. It goes on the board and when you've exhausted them all, THEN you go through and find the one that will actually work.


I need to encourage that brainstorming session in AJ, maybe even join him, before trying to work out the details. If I can do that, I know some incredible ideas will surface and we'll get to experience a more full life and a more full marriage.


Here are the full lyrics, I hope they can encourage you too.




Jack's Mannequin – Platform Fire

Tore up like your baby blue jeans
I was stepping through a fog
Under pressure, but I'm feeling weightless
Can't let heaven's pin-stripe shooting
Leave you carrying a cross
Across the desert when you're feeling faithless
After all, this haze is only temporary
Laughter falls on deaf ears in the auditorium

Stories stacked up so tall
And you don't talk me down
You're talking me through
Bright lights, our platform fire
I'm a man on a wire
You're here for the view

Scattered in the mist, unmoving
It's getting hard for you to watch
Me under pressure when I'm feeling weightless
Up where tensions aren't computing
And where I've never fallen off
I guess I'd like to think your worry's wasted
Worry's wasted on me
After all, this haze may not be temporary
I heard you call
From the back row of the auditorium

Stories stacked up so tall
And you don't talk me down
You're talking me through
Bright lights, our platform fire
I'm a man on a wire
You're here for the view
I'm a man on a wire
You're here for the view

So tell me what you think
When you see me there
And tell me what you see
When the smoke is clear

Tore up like your baby blue jeans
I was stepping through a fog

Stories stacked up so tall
And you don't talk me down
You're talking me through
Yeah, just like you always do
Bright lights, our platform fire
I'm a man on a wire
You're here for the view
I'm a man on a wire
You're here for the view

Bright lights, our platform fire
I'm a man on a wire
You're talking me through

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